Is this really the last one?

December with a tiny baby belly

The question that Matt asks me randomly.  Not that we think we really want more than 3, it's just giving up the excitement and having a new baby and a new family member.

Since I was a little girl I've dreamed of being a mommy.  I've always been excited about being pregnant and having little kids is something that's always topped the priority list for Matt and I.  So here we are at 33.5 weeks pregnant with baby #3, the grande finale, and I can't believe I'm here.  I can't believe that this is the last time I'll be pregnant (at least that I'm planning on).  I'm super excited to have 3 little lives in our house and we absolutely cannot wait to add our newest member.  Sarah Kate is dying to get her hands on that baby and Wilty has been begging me to get her out so he can hold her.  At some point I've always known we'll have to wrap it up and honestly we're to the point where we feel this is the right decision to stop at 3.  So I totally am excited and physically there are moments where I'm like okay I'd like to sleep all night without having to pee every hour.  And I mean every single hour!

But why am I sad?  I feel like it's the end of something huge.  When we were pregnant with baby Skater it's like our life stopped and stood still.  She was planned, as have been the other 2 as well.  So the first second I thought I could take a pregnancy test I did.  I saw a super faint line and 8 tests later we could't believe we were expecting a baby.  For the next x number of weeks from then all we did was talk, plan and in my case read EVERYTHING I could about EVERYTHING.  I thought that 9 months was like 9 years.  Now I look at my almost 4 year old sweet girl and can't believe how time flies.  Fast forward our lives to Matt looking over at me one day saying "I want another one."  Soon after we were expecting baby Wilty.  I didn't tell Matt I was testing with him.  I'd taken a test the month before and it was negative so I waited.  I wrapped it up and gave it to him in a box.  The look of shock and tears on his face were so precious.  You'd have thought the pregnancy was a surprise!  Having a boy after a girl meant I had a whole group of "boy" stuff, blue clothes and bedding to get and we were excited and anticipated his arrival.  We had Skater to keep us busy so it wasn't the crazy waiting like it was for her.  The end seemed to take forever because I had contractions absolutely constantly.

Super excited to be in our new house!

Now for Hadley...Matt describes it perfectly - with the other 2 time stood still, with this one it hasn't.  We found out we were pregnant and it didn't sink in.  It still to some degree hasn't even though I look like I'm smuggling a beachball.  Matt looked over me the other day and said "oh my gosh you're really pregnant.  We're really going to have 3."  I don't know if it's because I'm not even 28 yet and saying that I am going to have 3 kids sorta feels like I'm playing house or if it's just that we're so busy we haven't been super focused.  We've moved, renovated an entire house among just raising our family.  This pregnancy has FLOWN by.  I'm trying to cherish every moment, every kick and milestone because I know that I'm going to turn around and it's going to be over.  I'm going to miss these kicks in my belly and laying down and watching her move.

So here's to the last few weeks of this journey.  Before I know it I'm going to be knee deep in tiny children and then I'll turn around and this baby will be turning 2 like my baby Wilty did this week.  I can't believe how fast it all goes but I'm so thankful for Matt and that we're doing this.  My life is nuts sometimes and some people question our choices.  But I've said it to him and I'll say it here....this is exactly where I want to be and I'm so excited to be blessed with what we are.